Are you watching Cricket?

I am not. While I can't escape the constant buzz of cricket programming and news, I am not following it with any interest other than
  a) coming across cricket programming while channel surfing
  b) glancing the headlines while getting my daily tennis news fix on the sports page.

There are too many things about Cricket that I don't like and I can't enjoy it much.

A game, not a sport: I always felt that Cricket is a stupid game. Not sure you could call it a sport. You can definitely call Tennis a sport; Soccer: Yes, it's a sport. Cricket: Is it a sport? Not sure. It is only a game. A capricious one at that.

Can't root for the team: There is no point getting emotionally invested in the Indian team and fancying its chances of winning the World Cup when you are more worried about an embarassing loss than you are excited about a decent win.

Whacky Fans: After a recent loss, people picketted Sehwag's house and burnt his effigy. Well, that is an extreme case and not every one is so radical but even normal sane people do stuff like this: "I shouldn't go to the loo in between overs. If I do, India might lose. I'd better watch these ads and hold it until half-time." What is it about Cricket that makes people do stuff like this?

And then there are these stupid numberological theories to prove why India will win this time. I am not sure who creates these but they popup just before the world cup every single time. An example would be:
"   1975 = Captain's (Initials + DOB + City of Birth)
   1979 = Captain's (Initials + DOB + City of Birth)
   1983 = Captain's (Initials + DOB + City of Birth)
   1987 = Captain's (Initials + DOB + City of Birth)
   1991 = Captain's (Initials + DOB + City of Birth)
   1995 = Captain's (Initials + DOB + City of Birth)
   1999 = Captain's (Initials + DOB + City of Birth)
   2003 = Captain's (Initials + DOB + City of Birth)

   DOB : Date of Birth.
   Captain : The winning team's captain.

   In 2007, this fits for Indian teams captain. So we are definitely going to win it this time!!!"

Marketing/Advertising circus: Cricket is a tailor made for advertising. It takes a day to play the game and there are tons of breaks during the game. Several long breaks (tea/drinks, lunch) and there is a break after every over. So they get to show an ad roughly every couple of minutes.

And even within an over, there is no play happening when the ball is dead. During this time advertisers popup epiliptic-fit inducing sliding graphic/banner/ticker ads.

Consider this quote from Kunal Dasgupta, Sony TV (official broadcaster): "The entire format of the 2007 World Cup is flawed. In a 48-day tournament, if a team like Pakistan is already out for playing bad cricket in two matches, there is something really wrong. We were against this format and even told the ICC to reconsider it. But they refused.

Now that Pakistan is out, the fun of an India-Pakistan Super 8 match is gone. And if India lose another group match, the Cup will be the biggest flop in India and advertisers will lose value of their investments and we may also lose money even after selling all slots"

WTF?? Two teams have beaten Pakistan fair and square and this idiot is complainingg about the format because there will be lesser number of viewers to lap up all the ads he wants to show. In this moron's view, there is no notion of "may the better team win". He paid bazillion crores for the telecast rights and he has to make gazillion bazillion crores from it.

To generate more buzz these guys include Video footage/photos of 1983 world cup in cricket related programming. They even interview some cricketers from the 1983 team to make it more grand.

I won't surprised if in 2027 we are still shown the 1983 video footage. The only difference would be that there would be fewer members of the 1983 around and in the interview they'd be shown sitting in an easy chair on their patio with the walking stick beside them. You can clearly see that they are amused by the fact that it's nearly 50 years now and we still haven't won the cup after their sole win.

Cricket Punditry: The one thing that I hate the most regarding cricket is the cricket punditry. I can't stand Krishnamachary Srikanth. Same goes for Sidhu. And a bunch other pundits and their commentary. I can't understand quotes like :

"It is a good toss to win"

What does it really mean? Are there a bad tosses to win? or Are there good tosses to lose? If there is no reason to win a toss, there is not reason to toss is there?

I am reminded of a terrific Seinfeld quip: "Look he is pointing his toes, he must be great athlete" Thats how most of the cricket commentary appears to me.

Sourav Ganguly vs. Rest Of The World arguments:
This one has high entertainment value. There are these Sourav Ganguly vs. Rest of the World-type passionate hallway arguments that could devolve into fist-fights if saner heads don't prevail.

I'm sure there are million other wierd things about cricket and I can go on and on about them. I'd rather congrulate Bangladesh on comprehensively defeating India and leave it at that.

I'd prefer to think about why Federer lost to Guillermo Canas in
Pacific Life Open and what that means to his Grand slam chances.